As I sit here typing I can hear Elijah napping in his crib. It's a good sound, but a sound I've heard too much this year. Before you call me crazy, let me explain. His breathing sounds pitiful. He's congested and I can hear it, plus there's a sad little cough that comes into play every so often.
I got to Gram Jackie's yesterday to pick him up and his cheeks were way past rosy red, his whole body was hot to the touch, he wasn't playing and since he had been tugging at his ears for a few days I knew the familiarity of the situation all too well....another ear infection. The fourth one this year. He had one at the beginning of January, and as soon as he finished the anitbiotic for it he developed (or had a recurrence) another one. Less than two weeks later he was fighting RSV and his third double ear infection. The kid has had too many antibiotics and too many nebulizer treatments this year.
After I thought about what the weekend with a closed doctor's office would present, I decided to call the pediatritian to see if they could fit us in before they closed. I called, explained the sitution and was told that if I got there by 4.30 they would see my child. I was told this after telling the lady that I was 30 minutes away and it was already 4.05. So, the Mama Bear in this nice, non-confrontational girl came out. I snipped back, "What if I don't come and he gets worse this weekend?" I was told to take him to urgent care, to which I responded, "So I can pay three times as much as a doctor's appointment would cost?!" She asked if I was coming your not. I told her I would try, but that if I got there and they refused to see him that "I would be pissed at all the gas I wasted trying to get there." I'm telling you this about Mama Bear Syndrome: you don't want to be on the receiving end of it. What is this syndrome of which I speak? It's when a normally easy going, roll with the punches mother feels that the welfare of her child is being threatened. Like when one sees a cuddly little bear cub in the woods and starts to ooh and ahh, but then here comes a burly mama out of the woods ready to clobber anyone who even looks like he may cause issues for her dear cub. You don't mess with my babies. Period. I drove like a bat out of Hades, way faster than I should have gone through a construction zone (I didn't see any workers and I was paying careful attention), got to my exit and made it to the first stoplight with just enough time to find that traffic was backed up all the way to the office. I wasn't going to make it. I started to cry...the ugly cry. I know the guy on the opposite side of the road was thinking that I had lost my mind, but I didn't care. I had let my baby down. He wasn't feeling well and I couldn't get him what he needed. I felt like a failure. After several light changes, and way after 4.30 I pulled in the parking lot, got out to get Elijah, but changed my mind after finding him sleeping peacefully. I thought, "Screw it. I'm going home. I can take care of my baby and I'll get him care this weekend if he doesn't get any better." I pulled out of the parking lot. But Mama Bear came roaring back at the stop light and I thought to myself, "you're going to take your child in there and if they don't see him you're gonna tell them it was nice doing business with them, but if they don't care about your child, you don't care to patronize their office." I'm telling you, without Mama Bear I would never have the balls to do that.
To wrap up what really seemed like a short story, but has gone on forever now, we went in the office and no one acted like I was inconveniencing them at all. I made sure the receptionist knew it was after my deadline only to find it was no big deal. I paid, the nurse weighed my growing Little Man (over 23 pounds!) and we waited on the doctor. When he said the first ear was clear I started to feel like I had gone through all of this for nothing, but the other ear was starting to look rough so I felt validated. So here we are on the fourth round of antibiotics and hunkering down inside on this windy Saturday.
I know I'm not alone. Who else has had a Mama Bear Syndrome moment? According to Feedjit, I've had several new readers and I'm excited to hear from you!
Have a wonderful weekend! Share it with the ones you love!